Thoughts (Ranting, sexism, capital, culture)
This post is an attempt to fight my own superficiality and whatever image I consciously try to create. There are many things I don’t say directly on this blog about who I am. I am not entirely sure why. It will have little organization.
Most of my days this summer have been spent playing video games and drinking with friends. Every couple days I take some time to write and read. I have been depressed and so my interest in actually living has dwindled, and instead I have been choosing to live through distraction.
I know that deep down I am an addict. I am so reliant on outside things to complete me because I am unhappy. Cigarettes, alcohol, video games, tumblr, tv shows, music, etc.
I am angrier than I let on in this blog. In my personal life too. I am afraid to upset people so I often don’t say what I’m actually thinking.
Every time I watch TV I get angry. What is supposed to be funny, I rarely find funny. It all seems created, not for art or passion, but to sell. Ads tells us whatever works to make us buy their shit. Ads tell us that if we buy what they are selling we will be complete. So we buy whatever it is, in an attempt to fill whatever emptiness we feel, but these things don’t bring us any happiness. If they do, it is a temporary one influenced by the idea that we feel we should enjoy this. They are all distractions from a real life. What is a real life? One that is not based on distraction but fulfillment. I wish I knew how to live like that.
I identify as a feminist, though this has become a very unpopular title because many people misuse it. I’ve known a decent amount of people who are not actually feminists, though they think they are. They are only sexist women. I understand that people are angry and so they swing to an extreme, but it only creates more sexism, only this time against men.
For instance, it is inappropriate for men to make fun of women, but making fun of men is okay. People get upset when women are used as sex objects but when a man is used in the same way it is somehow okay. When someone says “Men are stupid” it is okay but when someone says the same for women it is now suddenly sexist. Though I cannot completely blame most people for this because it is ingrained into the ads we see and the shows we watch. Marketed especially towards men. Beer ads are a good example of this. It’s always guys watching football, drinking, looking at supposedly hot girls (who all look identical), and then for comic relief there is the nagging wife/girlfriend.
And just to clarify, I am not saying it should appropriate to make fun of women too. I’m saying that we should also focus on how men are portrayed.
Our culture seems to be made up of products and the creation of them. It upsets me that that is meant to be our common grounds. That we all eat hamburgers, drink bud light, have a corporate job, buy the new iphone, watch the same shows, etc.
There is no money in making a show, it is in the advertising. Shows are there to keep our attention in between ads.
Graffiti is illegal but an ad is fine. You can’t make money off anonymous street art but you can off an ad. That is why one is legal and the other is not.
As much as I critique pop culture, I try to avoid it, because as you might see, it makes me angry. Now there is a certain good in trying to change it but ultimately pop culture will never have depth. It is made to be immediately consumed and then forgotten. A momentary distraction from an unfulfilling life. I’ve seen a bumper sticker that I like around Berkeley, it says “If you’re not angry, then you’re not paying attention.” And perhaps not paying attention is the best option. Money decides. Nerdy young people do not. And though there are moments when a group joins together and changes things, how much better does it get? Every example I can think of has not changed things either at all or as they had wanted. When there is money in depth, we will have depth. When there is money in fulfillment, we will have fulfillment. Until then it is up to us, individuals to make ourselves, and whoever’s around us, as happy as possible. There is no reward, except happiness. Not the happiness you feel when you watch a cat video on youtube. Not the happiness you feel when you’re so drunk you can’t remember why you’ve been sad. A real happiness. Knowing that you’ve lived well and you’ve made things better for those around you.
